A day to Remember

As we both have proposed each other, our friendship turned into love. First few days, after I proposed there were no change in our love life. We both were leading the same life we led as we were friends. I didn’t find any change. She started to look deep into my eyes when we talk, when I smile, when I cracked a joke, when we were silent and I was uncomfortable with that. I don’t understand what she sees in my eyes for so long time.

The next day, we went to college as usual and took our seats. When the class were on, she adjusted herself and came little closer to me and I started watching her keenly from the one corner of my eyes. Her hand movements were sluggish with tremble, trying to take something but it looked like a thief robbing something. Suddenly my brain said “She didn’t get your mobile yet hope she is trying to take”. So I took my mob from my side and kept it beneath the desk where we keep our books. Her hands didn’t reach to mobile after I kept. She is trying something and I decided to watch it calmly. Her legs were stumbling though she was sitting. She took her hand, moved it slowly, took a glimpse around the class and reached my hand. A shiver ran through my spine as soon as she touched my hand. She has pinched, slapped, knocked my head before but she never held my hand. I didn’t give a grip till now. I turned myself, looked her and starred raising one eye brow. Her eyes were small than usual with a little fear in it and it raised after I raised my eyebrow. My lips curved as soon as I saw her, that reduced her fear and I gripped her hand. It is a good feeling to hold your loved ones hand, it assures you something on every situation.

During break I asked her “why did you struggle too much to hold my hands?”

What you watched it? How? Why didn’t you held it on my first attempt itself? You didn’t like to hold my hands right? And your stare gave me guilt idiot” she questioned.

“I started watching you as soon as you adjusted yourself and admired all your nuance movements” I chuckled.

I was feeling egregious that you behave defiance to me and shard my heart.

I just admired how you struggle and triumphant in my work. Why are you doing it like a venture? Be casual with me, I will not mind I said and returned back to our class. Our class was boring and I was least interested in listening to it. I had sara’s right hand in my left hand and watching it closely. The hand was pink in colour reflecting her blood level in her body. I held her hand in my left hand and made straight lines in her palm with my index finger. In ticklish she made crumble movements and I liked the new entertainment. As we were in the last bench we were not noticed by other classmates but many assumed our friendship as love from the first. So they won’t mind us if they see us holding hands. She cleared her throat and croaked “shall we go for a movie now?”

Movie is not a bad idea but we don’t have a show now rather we can go to our house and watch some movie if you are comfortable with it. “OK” she said and we left college after lunch. At home we have a mini theater to watch movies. A big screen with digital surround speaker system in front of a couch and a table. 

Mom said she is leaving out for shopping. We bid her bye, baked a bucket of popcorn and went to the theater room. She held out the DVD’s pouch and surfing which movie to play. She held out a movie named “Ring”. I have not watched the movie and she said has not too. So we played the movie and sat on couch. 

This time little closer that our triceps touched. It was a ghost movie and she was frightened from the first scene. I held her in my arms, she lay on my shoulder and in few minutes she huddled me.

Most of the scenes were frightening and each scene made us tighter. We watched the movie hugging each other. I kissed her forehead after movie ended and she was dazed after the kiss. I have the sequel of the movie shall we watch? I winked.

Enough for today. Later. She said.

One and half hour hug was awesome that I wanting more and more, said stressing more longer.

“I also need it but it’s time for your mom to return and we can enjoy another day” she made a cute wink.

She left home and we started talking on phone. When I am around her I forget myself and the time goes jiffy. After she left home an hour was like a day. As she had guests at home she hung the phone and to kill time I went online. Rika’s profile opened as it was my home page and she looked stunning. I glanced her entire profile once and I was shocked seeing a tab “Add friend”. Darn she removed me from her friend list. I sent her a friend request again and for the first time I built courage and sent a scrap stating “hi rika unknowingly I removed you from my friend list, have sent you one.” Thought it would be pleasing. I couldn’t see her picture in her profile due to her privacy settings.

My brain started thinking why did she remove me from her friend list? In the updates there was an application named “check who visits your profile?” and many had used it. I tried and it showed top three users who visits our profile and sara topped it. Damn is it real or hoax? Did rika also try it? Only because of this she removed me from her friend list?

Zillion questions arose similar to those questions and I stalked her profile as before and forgot totally about sara until she called me. I excused myself from her saying that I have head ache so I’m going to sleep and hung the phone.

I lay on bed thinking the reason of the removal and slept thinking about rika.

P.S. Being with your lover is elegant but playing with your lover is impeccable. 

Love: Select in a better way!

We spoke as if nothing has happened with us in college. I reached my home after college and Sara said she will not disturb me until I say her my answer. I took a blank sheet and wrote Sara on left and Rika on right. I separated the sheet half for both of them. I wrote intimacy in Sara and stranger in Rika. So I started checking with both of their pros and cons.

To see with Sara, As you know, we were very good friends and we are. She knows each and everything of mine and has been standing in every situation of my life from my college days. I move with her easily and am very comfortable with her. She trusts me more than her parents, she believes me whatever I say and she obeys my words. But for these reasons I can’t take advantage but yet it would be a thrill to take advantage.

Whereas with Rika, I first have to boast myself to chat with her, then she has to be interesting rather than snappish. I should then make her close with me and that’s a tough job as I don’t know how to do it, then we should exchange our numbers to make our friendship one step ahead, have to know each other well and then, only if at all she likes me and if she falls for me, my love for her would be cherished else it would be ditched.

Now to look at their character Sara is sweet, caring, open hearted, elegant, quick witted, trustworthy. My parents like her though, so if I say I need to marry her I think they won’t have any objections. She is pleasingly beautiful, quite fit with broad shoulders, I mean wide not thick, fair, few inches shorter than me, tiny eyes, small ears and pinky lips.

Rika is stuttering gorgeous, with perfect structure, fair and body maintenance like bollywood actresses. In her astounding beauty she would leave everyone inarticulate and I was flattered seeing her picture and made it wallpaper. No one can beat her in beauty. She has an ability to replace Katrina kaif and kareena kapoor over night if she goes into modeling. But I don’t know anything about her character. Only thing I know is she doesn’t speak with strangers, and has social network profile to keep in contact with her friends and relatives.

So I can’t assure that Rika would fall for me or I may dislike her after knowing her well. At the same time I love Sara too and I miss her every now and then. Rika beats Sara in beauty but no one can understand me like Sara. So I can’t deny her proposal just like that. Let the Rika stuffs be away from Sara. If I and Rika falls in love let me deal it with Sara then. Until then let my routine stalking continue and boost myself to speak to her.

I went to Sara’s house. She was astonished to see me. We went to terrace as I asked to talk to her in private. Her eyes were eager to know my decision and it showed in her face. I started saying what I have in my mind. “Sara as You know you’re my first female and best friend of mine. We know each other well and I didn’t know that you would propose me. I never expected your friendship would turn into love. You always call me a dumbass and u used to chuckle me saying that no girl would marry a dumbass like me. But now you have proposed this dumbass and I have thought well and came to decision. Keep your heart strong to hear this and I promise it would not affect our relationship. We can be as before or even better. Let me come to the point directly. Yes Sara I’m in love with you but I don’t believe in long term relationship. We can love but I can’t promise you that I will marry you and all other filmy stuffs. I have thought well and saying it. But if I need this relationship for long term we can if you don’t have objection. But for now I can’t promise you for a long term. Let us have it for short term and if none of the circumstances changes our love we can get into a long term relationship. And no offence if it hurts you.” As soon as I ended she was in tears.

"It is like you need all pleasures now but not joy” said Sara. “And I mean in all ways. I don’t understand why you said so and from when you thought like this. And I doubt it is the same jay I’m talking to. You made me to feel my love and now you say that you love me but you will not live with me. This is ridiculous. I guess you need to think again. Not needed. Let me make you to change your mind with my love because every love should do some changes in them.”

P.S. We cannot assure that love can happen only once.

She poured her heart out!

The ecstasy was still on and that made me quite witty in the class and got me more friends ( acquaintance would be appropriate). I was still sitting near Sara and we were as before “Close friends”. We were back chatting 24X7 as before but at the same time I didn’t stop stalking Rika. This became my routine work everyday. I always wanted to say about rika to Sara but I didnot get courage to say her and I don’t know the reason too. May be I don’t know how she will take it.

As usual our college went jiffy. I had my mobile every last hour of the college, Sara would have the rest of the day playing game in it and you know why I have it on the last hour :p . But now I have become normal and moving with Sara as before made her to be at her home rather than mine.

When the life was moving like this, one morning, Sara woke me and said she needs to talk to me. I compelled her to say it but she refused and said she will say it today. As usual we were going to college by walk. She didn’t utter a word after we stepped out of my house. I kept on pestering her, what she wanted to say but I couldn’t make her to say anything than “I will say you soon”. My head was full of too many questions and was anxious of knowing What it was. An hour passed, She didn’t get my mobile yet. I could sense her nervousness, it was too high and that created a small fear on one corner of my heart. Her fingers were dancing in the desk, a blush from the morning made her pink, her eyes were looking at me from one corner, legs were shaking in nervousness and she was much excited.

Can I know the reason of your excitement? I started.

Of course, for that we have to bunk this class. She said.

I’m comfortable here, you can say it right now.

The ambience is awkward, I need to go somewhere. Why don’t we go to the park? She asked.

If I get to know only if we go to park, then let us go.

It was morning break for brunch, We left our class and started to park. During brunch our college park would be filled with lovers. All couples would occupy the seats and would be romancing. Sometimes it would be good to see but many a times it will be awkward.

Whenever we walk together, our sides would touch. But today, from morning, she maintained a gap.

By the time we reached the park was full. I asked her What was the matter? She asked me to wait till every one moves to class. As soon as the break bell rang, everyone left the park empty with me and Sara alone. She was playing here legs with sand making semi circles with her thumb. 

Are you comfortable with this ambience or we should change our place? I questioned.


No we can be here. She said and took a seat under a big tree which gave a good shadow on the sunny day. It was cooler here rather than the bench under a fan in our classroom. I sat in a next bench from her’s.

She looked here and there. I was watching her movements and  waiting her to start. But she did not seem to start. Why the hell are we here? I shouted.

Jay, I have to talk to you.

That is why we are here. I said hoarsely.

I have not slept for past two days.

What happened? Are you alright? Should we consult a doctor? I asked.

She adjusted herself to the hedge of the bench and said “Let me complete, don’t interrupt”

Jay I’m happy that we are back as before. When you stayed silent without talking to me it hurt me badly. I have been crying for hours without any reason. I don’t want to spoil the situation by saying all my sorrows now and it was not this I wanted to say you. I said it just to let you know. The most toughest days I spent was those two days of our challenge. I had my mobile in my hand throughout the day and was unlocking  it every now and then to check for your texts. I couldn’t concentrate anything on those two days. I didn’t sleep but cried all night for accepting the challenge. That really hurt me a lot and I never wanted any of my day to be like that. If you have not put a challenge then we would not have faced all this. (Each and every sentence from her mouth made infinite expressions in my face thinking what she is talking about exactly). But I thank you for that challenge. Actually your challenge made my brain to think well about our relationship, but my heart did not want to lose the challenge as you know I don’t like to lose in anything. At the same time after our challenge you changed yourself and I know the reason too. (I was stunned to hear this from her, is she speaking about Rika? How did she know?) You were right Jay we are too intimate. But you need not prove it by keeping me away from you. I couldn’t bare the pain when you left me for these days. You have already proved What we are upto. During our challenge I typed few texts to you but I didn’t send you and its in my drafts still. By now I have spent all joyful moments, sad moments and hurtful moments with you and by you. I thought well and decided that I need you to glorify my life and only you can make it because I have been happy with you than I was with my parents. I need you to be in my life forever Jay. “I Love You Jay, Will you accept my love?” She said in her knees.

I stood enthralled, astonished by her speech and a confusion started in my mind. Which I wished should not happen, just happened. I know her well and I have a soft feelings for her but Rika was the one whom I love if I’m not wrong. But what about Sara? What should I answer to her? Should I decline it? If Rika was already committed what will I do? Sara thinks I’m love with her but how will I explain her that I’m not in love with her and how will I say that challenge was because of the misunderstanding of intimacy between us. It was the first time I’m hearing that a girl proposed first to boy. I have neither watched in any movies and nor read in any stories so.

She interrupted me by handing over her phone to me.

It showed Drafts. Her draft read ”Jay you are right, I am in love and I have realized it. I need to say you now but I don’t want to lose the challenge. I will win this challenge and confess some other day and forgive me for this and for hurting you. Love you.”

The next draft read ” I wish to add a Love you in the good night and good morning texts every day. Can I send you like that?”

There were other few drafts which said few lines similar to that. It drafts reminded me of my draft which I stored during the challenge. Damn I changed my mobile.

I handed her phone to her and sat in the bench thinking. She is too much in love and it is not the prompt situation to say about Rika. Let me ask her for time.

Sara I am dazed by your proposal but I need to think about this. I will answer you next week. But we can be as we are now whatever the answer is and I promise you for this. I said and we went back to our class and sat next to each other.


P.S. never under estimate or over estimate any love, think well before you answer.